CARE THE LITTLE CURVE-How to care your baby’s teeth?

A smile from my little son can turn even the worst moment the best. I hope none will disagree to that point of falling in love with any little one’s lovely million dollar smile.(I love that rabbit tooth protruding). I had been to my dentist yesterday and I had a chance to know about pediatric dentistry in detail from him and his clinic. I thought I shall put on all that I knew from him,his pamphlets,his references(I have translated them below) and books.

When does teething actually begin?

Teething actually begins even when baby is still in the womb and whitening of gums followed by real teething can commence as early as 3 months or as late as 1 year.Teeth actually begins to sprout one at a time beginning with the bottom two middle ones,followed by top two and then the sides. At around 2 or 3 years baby will have a complete set of 20 teeth(Milk teeth) and they shouldn’t begin to fall till 6 years until the permanent teeth begin to grow.The falling of milk teeth and growth of the permanent teeth happens between 6 years to 12 years.By 12 or 13 years most of the permanent teeth would have well grown.

What are the signs of teething?

• Unusual irritability
• Drooling
• Fussiness
• Refusal of food
• Diarrhea
• Lack of sleep
• Fever
• Chewing/Trying to bite

How to ease the teething pain?

• Use a hard teething ring and let baby chew on
• Use a clean cold cloth and rub gently on the gums
• If your baby is elder you can give home made unsalted crackers(My mother used to make murukku/soup sticks with rice & urad dhal flour and give him to gnaw).But be careful about choking.
• Kindly avoid any medicines/painkillers without a pediatrician’s prescription.(These medications might lead to serious throat problems,Reye’s syndrome,stomach irritation and several other complications).

When is it necessary to clean my baby’s teeth?

It is mandatory to clean your baby’s mouth(tongue and gums) from first day.

How can I clean my baby’s teeth?

From day one your baby’s mouth(tongue and gums) should be cleaned with your clean finger or a soft clean cloth. This helps in avoiding thrush at early stages. Gently rub the gums and tongue with the cloth .When the first tooth begins to come,you can make a regular habit of brushing teeth twice a day.Begin with your fingers as brush and slowly start with a specialized baby friendly silicon finger brush. Brush gently on all sides of the mouth. Brushing twice a day is a must for every baby with zero plus tooth/teeth. It is not mandatory to use a tooth paste until the baby learns to spit/gargle. Using a tooth paste too early might end up in unwanted fluoride intake.

When should I first meet a pediatric dentist?

Do not delay your first dental visit beyond your little one’s second birthday. From then make it a mandate to visit once in 6 months.

What practices have to be avoided to preserve good health of my LO’s teeth?

• Nursing bottle Caries is the most common pediatric dental problem which arises in babies.This is mainly due the habit of sleeping along with feeding bottle in hand.This leads to very early cavities.Avoid sending your babies with feeding bottles/sippers/milk/juice to bed. If milk is given at bedtime,prefer to make it little early and brush before bedtime/clean the mouth before bedtime.
• Secondly lack of nutrition might damage the health of teeth.Hence be sure to include plenty of fruits and vegetables in your baby’s diet from 180 th day.
• Thirdly the habit of frequent consumption of foods like chocolates,sugary items,chips,sweets,baked foods result in cavities in milk tooth.Hence fix a regular schedule for eating habits rather than making baby munch all through the day.The American Association of Pediatric Dentistry recommends 4 to 6 ounces(.12 litres) of juice a day for 1 year to 6 years
• And finally habits like sucking the thumb,biting the lips,breathing via mouth might lead to misappropriate teeth growth.

Happy Motherhood!Wish your baby a healthy and happy life ahead.

My sincere thanks to my dentist and pediatrician for his patience to clarify my doubts.

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Please visit my food blog for healthy recipes of home made baby food at www.kitchenkathukutty.wordpress.com

Do read my other write ups on parenting and baby care :

Growing a non-fussy/non-picky eater

My success story-To get my child eat right

Top mistakes which make life-saving medicines life killing

Pregnancy myths and truths

The first few-What would your teach your baby first?

A lone mom’s day-Motherhood fun and fuss of a first time mother

References:

Click to access G_InfantOralHealthCare.pdf

http://www.babycenter.in

Disclaimer:

The images have been randomly chosen from the web for mere representation (unless the blog id is mentioned in the image)

Growing a “NON-FUSSY/NON-PICKY” eater

I have always felt that the prime duty and the biggest challenge of mothers is to make the child right. To Eat right to me means to eat the right quantity of the right food at the right time. Unless we mothers try to develop a healthy pattern of eating habit to our babies,their suffering is going to be hard and long-lasting. Here are few points I would recommend from my experience to help babies eat right and stop them from growing into a fussy/picky eater in toddler/preschooler stage. If you ask me if these are proved by any research,my answer is a plain no. These are pointers from my most beloved pediatricians,doctors among kith and kin,experienced mothers & grandmothers and my experience with my LO.(For all recipes of baby food and insights on weaning please refer here.)

To develop the right eating habit is a topic which has a never-ending story to it. Just because I am jotting down points on this topic doesn’t mean my son always eats right. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…. It is an ongoing process and failures kiss me more than victories. The motherly bond in me helped me highlight these and I hope it would help all young mothers.
CHOOSING THE RIGHT FOOD:
There are infinite helping hands when it comes to provide advice. I heard all and appreciated them, but the choice of right food was unto my pediatrician and me. The right food in my opinion should be healthy cum balanced and must definitely not be processed/ packed/ junk. I never gave up on that point and hence I had a clear path towards the right food. Since the family’s food habit did not differ much, I never had to deter from it.
RIGHT TIME & RIGHT QUANTITY:
The thumb rule for knowing the right time and quantity is “Demand on feed”. From the day he bloomed in this world to till date I go by this mantra.Beyond a certain age I slowly transited his food timings like the elders of the family. Slowly he had his chair in our dining table. This helped him discover food textures, observe our eating habits which in further made him eat on his own. As I fed on demand, I got hold of the right quantity in few days time by his expressions. (Now he says very clearly to us “enough J “). The motherly intuition and satisfactory feeling also plays a role in this.
CLIMB THE LADDER GRADUALLY:
I made the transition from breastfeeding to weaning slowly & steadily. I followed/follow three-day wait rule for each new ingredient in his food. This helped/helps me in knowing what ingredients are liked by him and suited him. It also aided him in knowing different tastes and relishing them.
NEVER GIVE UP:
From breastfeeding to weaning, I have encountered millions of failures. There were several hunger strikes, daily tantrums and even mini wars between us. Sometimes it was a phase and sometimes it was adamant/playful nature. Many a times I have ended up going crazy in making him eat. I tried with patience and tried with different tactics, varieties. Few trials even went on for a month-long hunger strike. I kept running to break it and every time my patience and perseverance has been paid so far. One of my family friends(doctor) insisted me to try on everything and gave me bumper point of advice. ” When your child refuses a food A , try it after 15 days . Never ignore that he doesn’t like. A baby should like every variety of home-made food by all means and there should be no foods in the list of “My baby hates it”. ”
MOM & ME MEALTIME:
When it comes to mealtime, I ensured not involving any gimmicks like carrying him all over/showing him TV/playing with something to make him eat/doing any circus activities. There was/is only three M’s (Mom, Me, Meal). No distraction. So I neither had to run behind him nor do any performances to make him eat. (Old habits die hard, don’t they?) I was strict about timings and quantity but I never attempted to force. As he grew I gave him the bowl and spoon and encouraged him to feed himself though it turned meal times messy.
CLEAR TIMELINE:
The process of weaning was too systematized with the help of my pediatrician and I never had any confusion on what to give and what not to give,when to give etc. There are too many schools of thoughts with respect to weaning. Each type of weaning has its own pro’s and con’s and what is best suited to our cute little world is our choice as “None knows a baby better than a mother”. I strictly followed/follow all instructions pertaining to foods to be avoided till 1 year,till 2 years. This helped me giving him a wide variety of foods in a slow manner and it ensured that he relished each ingredient. I tried to make him eat like the family at around 10 months but at the same time there are still few ingredients which I am yet to include in his menu(He is 15 months old now).

INFORMATION IS WEALTH:
Hear from billions. Listen to millions. Read thousands. Watch hundreds but one final decision because “nobody else can say what is right for your baby than you dear mommy“.This is my way of gathering information about my LO. I was/am constantly learning from people, books, websites, papers and all possible resources. When it comes to the final choice/decision I trust my intuition, knowledge and doctor’s advice and stick on to the most suited one. With the enormous growth of technology we have several sources of information served right on our table. At times we might get confused with them and the more the mother gets confused the less is the choice of the mother getting it right. Whenever I get confused , I felt like I am becoming a point of exploitation and I fall a prey to all who aim to commercialize.
NO CREATIVITY ON TABLE:
I have heard my grandmothers stating that their children(minimum of 10) never said no to any food and the fussy eater was almost terribly new to them. Eating is a habit associated primarily with quenching hunger and gaining nutrition. So I was enforced to emphasize on that. The food has to be edible,presentable and healthy. I felt making a plate appealing was more appropriate for my blog but not for my son. I wanted my son to love each dish in the way it is , in the way it tastes. My pediatrician added to this saying that I should never have the habit of including honey/sweetener/curd as a side dish for any tiffin or combining bitter food with sweet to make him eat. She repeatedly said a baby must like a piece of bitter gourd as such just as he would love to have any sweetened dish.Also a baby should start liking the original look,texture,taste of every food Hence there was no mixing/blending/decorating any food. This will definitely help to grow a “non-fussy/non-picky” eater.

The below point is the mother of all without which the story could have been just a story and not a success story. I am blessed with super informative parents and my beloved best half, a supportive and trusting family who completely invested their confidence in me when it comes to the welfare of my son, very noble doctors who are real angels on earth and above all the unique strength/bond which motherhood gave me.

For all recipes of healthy home made baby food,do’s and don’ts of weaning,month wise diet chart and insights on weaning please refer here.

My success story – Getting my child to eat right!

Last night Mrs.Megha had put up a post in MW group regarding a blogging contest. I initially thought submit an article which I had handy with me but my article was no way related to the topics there. I left it cool . My husband encouraged me and made me complete it. Thanks to Shalu and Kalyani for boosting me up 🙂

The topics were as below

For Moms

• To have a second child: Why you did or did not do
• My success story – Getting my child to eat right!
• My success story- How I control the 3 T’s- Temper, Tears and Tantrums of my little one

For Dads

• My journey as an evolved dad: Breaking stereotypes
• Changing role of fathers: Difference between you as a father and your father

My choice was My success story – Getting my child to eat right!. People who know me would have already guessed that I would choose this because I always stress on feeding the baby right and I am foodie/food blogger at www.kitchenkathukutty.wordpress.com.

Here is my piece of article for parentune. Read and let me know your comments 🙂

“Getting my child to eat the Right quantity of Right food at the Right time.” My perception of this topic and the story is great, on-going and endless.
CHOOSING THE RIGHT FOOD:
There are infinite helping hands when it comes to provide advice. I hear and appreciate each. But the final choice of right food for my little world is unto my pediatrician and me. The right food according to me should be healthy cum balanced and must definitely not be processed/ packed/ junk. I never give up on that point and hence I my path towards the right food is always clear. Since the family’s food habit did not differ much, I never had to deter from it.
RIGHT TIME & RIGHT QUANTITY:
The thumb rule for knowing the right time and quantity is “FEED ON DEMAND”. Beyond a certain age I slowly transited his food timings like the elders of the family. Slowly he had his chair in our dining table. This helped him discover food textures, observe our eating habits which in further made him try to eat on his own. As I fed on demand, I got hold of the right quantity in few days time by his expressions. (Now he says very clearly to us “enough“). The motherly intuition and satisfactory feeling also plays a major role in this.
CLIMB THE LADDER GRADUALLY:
I made the transition from breastfeeding to weaning very slowly & steadily. I followed/follow three day wait rule for every new ingredient in his food. This helped/helps me in knowing what ingredients are liked by him and suited him. This aids him in knowing different tastes and relishing them.
NEVER GIVE UP:
The journey is not a bed of roses. There were several hunger strikes, daily tantrums and even mini wars between us. Sometimes it was a phase and sometimes it was adamant/playful nature. Many a times I have ended up going crazy in making him eat. I tried with patience and tried with different tactics, varieties. Few trials even went on for a month long hunger strike. I kept running to break it and every time my PATIENCE AND PERSEVERANCE has been paid so far.
MOM & ME MEALTIME:
When it comes to mealtime, I ensure not involving any gimmicks like carrying him all over/showing him TV/playing. There was/is only three M’s (Myself, My son, Meal). No distraction. So I neither run behind him nor do any performances to make him eat. (Old habits die hard, don’t they?) I was/am strict about timings and quantity but I never attempted to force.
The below point is the mother of all without which the story could have been just a story and not a success story. I am blessed with a supportive, informative and trusting family who completely invested their wholesome confidence in me, very noble doctors who are real angels on earth and above all the unique strength/bond which motherhood gave me.
Thanks for this opportunity Parentune and a special thanks to Megha 🙂

Top mistakes which make “LIFE-SAVING” medicines “LIFE-KILLING”

Our ancestors were known for living without medicines but we have trapped ourselves and our future generations with medicines.I wanted to write down this article when I learnt few habits with respect to handling medicines from my husband. He used to carry a small first aid kit with him wherever he travels.The warnings he had given me all through and the outcomes of all my personal experiences are here for you to read and realise how small mistakes in handling/taking life-saving medicines can kill our lives.

• SELF-MEDICATION-All of you can guess this item under this topic.But have we really stopped this worst habit of self medicating?. The answer honestly should be NO.Doctors/Medical Practitioners examine a patient,enquire thoroughly on medical history and then provide a prescription which is relevant to that scenario. But we try to have medicines by ourselves based on our “so-called” knowledge/word of mouth or use any over-the-counter.There will be no danger unless things happen right.But what would be the result when some side effects affect your organs unknowingly?We neither know nor can make a guess on it. Atleast adults would be able to scream on adverse effects,if any.What would infants/babies/toddlers do?They would have no clue on what had happened.Always approach a doctor when you are ill and take only the medicines prescribed by him/her.
• Trying to use the “LAW OF DIRECT PROPORTIONS” in dosage-I have heard from many people that they take a tablet X twice the dosage than prescribed if the illness is uncontrollable.This mostly happens with pain killers. If taking one gives you good result it doesn’t necessarily imply that taking two will give you better results. People do this in the reverse manner too.I feel better than yesterday today so let me reduce my dosage. An absolute error is this. A doctor prescribes a dosage/course of medicines after having evaluating the patient and knowing the drugs. Increase the level of tolerance in you rather than increasing a drug dosage.Any illness will have its own course of action in your body and in the similar fashion every drug will have its own reacting time.
• REUSING A PRESCRIPTION-Most of us try to self-medicate from our earlier prescriptions.We try to buy the medicines which had been prescribed by the doctor few months ago for the same illness instead of visiting the doctor again.Of-course every hospital has a long queue and many eat your entire day before you get an appointment.But is your well-being not more important?You might suffer from the same simple fever which you had suffered 6 months ago.But using the same medicines without doctor advice is definitely not advisable.
• LETHARGIC PURCHASE AT PHARMACY-How many of us read the label in the medicine,check for expiry date,check for match of drugs as prescribed by doctor at the moment we purchase from the pharmacy?We don’t do at all.We assume that the medicines we take home are the ones which the prescription reads.NEVER ASSUME.HAVE AN EYE.Have you ever been keen on noticing that the name of medicine & expiry date is not cut in the medicine strip provided?The answer is again a NO atleast from 50% of us. This lethargy ends up in many confusions. Say for example,doctor has prescribed you a medicine X for giddiness during travel and you have this medicine X with other “n” number of other medicines.In case of emergency how would it be possible for you or someone who is accompanying you to identify this medicine X if the name is cut?The emergency condition will still worsen.Always keep in mind to carefully read all instructions/labels in the medicine,verify the name across the doctor’s prescription and also check for expiry date right at the counter before you pay the bill and receive a bill only if it covers all information.
  
• HOARDING DRUGS-In every house there will be strip of paracetamol.Hope none of you will deny this. I agree that fever is quite common and we need the medicine handy. But please make it a point to consult your family doctor 3 months once on emergency/preliminary drugs for the family and then have it handy.I say this because drugs keep changing and so are the medical conditions.We are no experts at it. You would have noticed many messages floating around saying few very commonly used drugs were banned .How dangerous it would be when we hoard such a “banned” medicine and try to provide our sickly kith and kin?Keep a note of the expiry date and kindly throw away expired drugs right away. Because when a real emergency occurs not all of us will have that presence of mind to verify the name,expiry date and stuffs. My husband always revives the contents of his first aid kit and places the then prescription and bill in the box. He makes it a point to discard the expired medicines immediately.
• NOT CARING ABOUT SHELF LIFE-We have been used with the term “EXPIRY DATE” w.r.t medicines.There is something called shelf life too.When I had visited my son’s pediatrician she enlightened me on this.There are few types of syrups/drops/tonic/pills which comes with an instruction like “Use it within 5 days from day of opening the bottle/Don’t use beyond 24 hours of suspending the medicine”. Be careful to note such specific instructions and discard the medicines then and there.
• SHARING PRESCRIPTIONS-Sharing always comes out of caring but that would not be the case with medicines. Sharing might turn fatal.We would come across this statement very often “Medicine Z gave me a quick relief,why don’t take a try?”. Wanna take a try and stay at bed permanently? Please don’t share your medications with anyone else. Remember you are unique and so is the person at the receiving end. Medical conditions,physiology,drug reactions are not going to be the same even if the symptoms and complications sound similar.
• TAKING OVER-THE-COUNTER MEDICINES/ALTERNATE MEDICINES-We have the habit of trusting the pharmacists/workers in the pharmacy than our doctors. A medical emergency occurs and the next immediate move of 90% of the population would be to reach a near-by medical shop and ask for a medicine by murmuring tits and bits of the actual scenario. Even if the pharmacy people refuse to offer any medication without prescription we would be ready to make all possible dramas to get the medicine or atleast the name of the medicine. This is equally harmful as self-medication.Many OTC drugs have proved to be fatal and that is the reason behind making it compulsory to provide prescription at the time of purchase.(Some pharmacies crack us down by demanding prescription for certain items they sell which is never prescribed by  any doctor like health drink mix,inhalers etc).The next common thing which happens is accepting /using a drug X instead of drug Y(prescribed) just because it was not easily available. Always have the habit of asking the doctor if the medicines prescribed would be easily available across the city.If the answer is going to be no,take it as your right to know the alternative medicine from medical practitioner at the same juncture.
• SHOWCASING YOUR PHYSICAL STRENGTH ON PILLS-Do you find the topic funny? How many of try to break the unbreakable tablets before swallowing it?Many powder the tablets and consume. A few have the habit of scrapping a top layer since it gives a bitter taste. Many others discard few parts of a capsule. All these might seem as jokes. But they might turn into serious health issues at times. Know the right way to consume a medicine and do it right.
• WRONG COMBINATION OF FOOD-Always make it a habit to know from your doctor what food have to be avoided when you are on a medication. Few foods might react adversely with certain combination of drugs or a lot of foods might not let drugs to react right.Hence know them right and incorporate them into your food accordingly.It is mandatory to avoid alcohol,tobacco and nicotine products since it might have an adverse effect.

To sum up,keep your doctor as the first point of contact and reliance when it comes to treating sickness and medicines.Speak to your doctor very clearly on the following

1. What are the medicines prescribed along with the dosage?
2. What are the possible side effects and immediate remedies?
3. Medical allergies,if any
4. What type of food to avoid?
5. Availability of the medicine in pharmacies across the city and alternate medicines
6. When to increase/decrease the dosage?
7. Symptoms/Necessity to stop usage of medicine,if any

Wishing you a healthy and happy life 🙂

Pregnancy myths and truths those bombarded me and finally busted ;-)

Are you expecting? Wow!Hearty congrats 🙂 Wish you an enjoyable carrying phase and safe delivery. You should be the eye of the apple of your kith and kin.That’s the best part of such phases 🙂 I will be taking you through few funny myths which would be bombarding you in all directions. You will have very new care takers sprouting from the family and friends circle offering you a bouquet of “DO’S & DON’T s”. Do lend your ears but let the final call be yours based on your intuition and your doctors feedback.Let me try my best to help you in choosing between the truth and the myth. Do have a hearty laugh 😛

Place pictures/wall hangings of cute little babies in such a way that they appear right in your eyes as soon as you wake up.This will make your baby in the womb look cute/beautiful.

Absolutely false.How did those pictures get such a heavenly power? The complexion/features/looks of the baby completely depends only on hereditary factors.However having a pleasing atmosphere around a mom-to-be gives a relaxed feeling.

It is time to “EAT FOR TWO”

Eat for two for 9+ months ?Are you joking?How many pounds would I gain more?The exact truth is you have to eat healthy with little extra care when you are carrying but not eat “EXTRA”. Eat well. Have a complete nutritious diet . It is as simple as that. On an average you need 300 extra calories per day. Avoid alcohol,junk food and  allergens,if any.(This is mandatory).

The shape of the belly,the cravings the mother has,the heart rate determines the gender of the baby.

Absolutely no.The myth goes like this if you are carrying high/low ,it is a girl/boy.The shape of the bump depends on various factors like muscle size,posture,position of fetus etc.The salty the mother to be craves for indicates a boy in the womb and vice verse. Lesser heart rate indicates a boy.Your baby’s heart rate will keep varying in each of your scan,depending on the age of the fetus and activity level during scan.The gender cannot be pre- determined by any factor.

Suffering from a heartburn,itchy belly indicates that the baby in the womb has more hair.

My son hardly had any hair on birth but I had heart-burns and itchy belly all through.Heart burn is only due to the hormone changes during pregnancy and due to lack of space for the digestive system.(The baby grows and grabs the entire space in your tummy). Skin irritation is common because the skin stretches and lacks moisture.

All pregnant women will have morning sickness/nausea and stretch marks (post delivery).

Nah.. Nah…Nah… All these depends completely on individual hormonal changes. There are many gifted expectant moms who never had an episode of morning sickness.It is hard to predict if you will stretch marks.But I can definitely say stretchmark is not a mandatory gift post delivery.

Pineapple consumption will lead to miscarriage.

Is it? Are you planning to swallow tons of pineapple? The truth is that pineapple has bromelain,a type of protein which softens the cervix .But for this you have to consume gallons of juice or tons of pineapple slices.Eating a few would do no harm.There are few mentions across the internet stating that pineapple juice in excess was used to induce labour naturally. Hence avoid it if you are already running a risk of miscarriage.

Don’t lie on your back.

This is one myth which drove me crazy. I have always slept upright and I missed my sleep during all trimester hearing to this.The truth is doctors recommend sleeping on your left to ease the blood circulation to placenta.That does not mean you shouldn’t sleep in any other position. Definitely an expectant mother cannot sleep in one position. She needs options. Sleep on your right/left/back and never on your tummy.When you turn and change position do it with care. Don’t turn swiftly.

Having saffron with milk increases baby’s complexion.

Nothing can increase your baby’s complexion.It is only the gene which is responsible for the complexion and nothing else.But having few strands of saffron adds strength to your uterus definitely.

Tender coconut water is harmful while you’re expecting.

I love tender coconut.But when people forcefully refrained me from taking it I took the stand of researching on the topic.All that they provided as the reason was unsafe to baby. And few even said my baby’s head would resemble the shape of a coconut.(ROFL:))The truth is as follows

• It is a zero cholesterol and fat-free beverage.
• It helps in regulating your BP and cholesterol as it increases the level of HDL in your body
• It boosts and rejuvenates the water level of the body which helps an expectant mother to get relived from dehydration and constipation
• This refreshing drink provides you potassium,magnesium and protein which helps in the growth of the baby.

  
  

These are few funny things which I came across. Enjoy reading and have a hearty laugh. Don’t come to conclusion that all those are said by elders fall into this category.There are definitely a lot true ones.Heed to them.Get your intuitions right and the advice your medical practitioner .

Wish you a safe delivery 🙂

தொலைந்த உறவுகள்

 படபடவென்று ஒரு சத்தம், கண் விழித்து பார்த்தபோது ஜன்னலோரமாக சிறகடித்துக் கொண்டிருந்தது ஒரு புறா. அப்போது தான் குளியல் முடித்து வந்த புதுமணப்பெண் போல காட்சி அளித்தாள் பூமித்தாய். என்ன ஒரு விந்தை வருடத்தில் மூன்று மாதம் மட்டும் குளித்தாலும் இவள் மட்டும் என்றும் அழகாகத்தான் இருக்கிறாள். வெளியே மழை நின்றதன் அடையாளமாக பறவைகளின் கீச் ஒலியும் மக்கள் நடமாட தொடங்கிய சத்தம் கேட்க தொடங்கியது.

“டேய் எழுந்திருடா மணி எட்டாகிவிட்டது schoolக்கு போகணும்.” அம்மாவின் குரல் கேட்ட பின்னும் போர்வையை இழுத்து தலை வரை போர்த்திகொண்டான் வேலன். வேலன் சோமுவின் ஒரே மகன், எட்டாவது படிக்கிறான்.சிறுவயது முதலே அம்மாவின் அரவணைப்பில் வளர்ந்ததால் அவனுக்கு அப்பாவிடம் நெருக்கம் குறைவு. இதை எல்லாம் பார்த்துகொண்டிருந்தவருக்கு தன் பள்ளி நாட்கள் நினைவுக்கு வந்துபோனது.

மணக்க மணக்க பில்ட்டர் காபியுடன் எதிரே நின்ற மனைவியை பார்த்து நினைவுக்கு வந்தார். ” என்ன அப்பா பையன் ரெண்டு பேருக்கும் எழுந்து கிளம்ப  ஐடியாவே இல்லையா”. இன்று சோமுவின் கம்பெனியின் ஆண்டு விழா. விழா ஏற்பாடுகள் அனைத்தையும் பார்த்துவிட்டு வீட்டுக்கு வரும்போது இரவு 12 ஆகிவிட்டது.

கல்லூரி படிப்பை முடித்து இரண்டு ஆண்டுகளில் தொடங்கிய கம்பெனி இப்போது பதினைந்து வருடங்கள் ஓடிவிட்டது. மனிதன் தன் வாழ்நாளில் தொலைத்துவிட்டு தேடும் விலை மதிப்பில்லா ஒரு பொருள் காலம். கம்பெனி தொடங்கி இரண்டு ஆண்டுகளில் வேலன் பிறந்தான். பிள்ளை பிறந்த செய்தி கேட்டு வெளியூரில் இருந்து அடித்துபிடித்து வந்தார் சோமு. சுகப்ரசவம் தாயும் சேயும் நலம். ஆஸ்பத்திரியில் வந்து பிள்ளையை கையில் எடுத்துப் பார்த்தார். ” கண்ணும் மூக்கும் அப்படியே அம்மா மாதிரி” யாரோ தூரத்து உறவினரின் குரல். இது தான் என் வாழ்வின் அர்த்தமா?? இவன் தான் கடவுள் தந்த பரிசா?. இந்த உயிரை வளர்த்து பாதுகாப்பது தான் என் வாழ்வின் முடிவா. மகிழ்ச்சியில் ஊருக்கே விருந்தளிக்க எண்ணினார், ஆனால் பாவம் சோமுவிடம் அப்போது கைசெலவுக்கு வைத்திருந்த 100  ரூபாய் மட்டுமே இருந்தது.

பிள்ளை பிறந்த இரண்டு நாட்களில் ஒரு முக்கியமான ஆர்டருக்காக சென்னை திரும்பவேண்டிய சூழ்நிலை. மனதை கல்லாக்கிகொண்டு திரும்பினார். நாட்கள் கடந்தது. நம் பிள்ளையாவது கஷ்டமில்லாமல் வளரவேண்டும் என்ற ஒரு உந்துதலால் இரவு பகல் பாராமல் உழைத்து கம்பெனியை இன்று தமிழகத்தில் தலைசிறந்த 10  கம்பெனிகளில் ஒன்றாக உயர்திருந்தார். அப்படி வளர்த்த கம்பெனிக்கு இன்று ஆண்டு விழா.

படுக்கையை விட்டு எழுந்து குளித்து முடித்து கீழே டைனிங் டேபிள்க்கு வந்தபோது மணி எட்டரை ஆகியிருந்தது. தட்டில் இருந்த இட்லி சாம்பாரை அவசர அவசரமாக சாபிட்டுகொண்டிருந்தான் வேலன். ” டேய், mobile போனை கீழ வெச்சிட்டு மெதுவா சாப்பிடேன் டா என்ன அவசரம்?”. அப்பா சொன்னதை காதில் கூட வாங்காதவனாய் இருந்தான் வேலன். தலை நிறைய மல்லிகை பூவும் பட்டு புடவையுமாக தயாராக நின்ற மனைவியை பார்த்த சோமுவுக்கு இந்த பதினைந்து ஆண்டுகளில்தான் அவள் எவ்வளவு மாறிவிட்டாள். தன் குடும்ப கடமைகளையும் சேர்த்து அவளே எல்லாமுமாக தன்னையும் வேலனையும் எவ்வளவு அழகாக பார்த்துகொள்கிறாள் ஆனால் அவளது இந்த 15 ஆண்டுகளில் தலையில் ஓரிரு வெள்ளை முடி எட்டிப்பார்த்துகொண்டிருந்தது , கண்களின் அருகே சிறு சிறு சுருக்கங்கள் அவளது முதுமையின் துவக்கத்தை பறைசாற்ற தொடங்கியிருந்தது. அன்றைய விழாவில் தான் பேசவேண்டியதை யோசித்துகொண்டே சாப்பிட்டுமுடித்து காரில் கிளம்பினர் சோமுவும் அவரது மனைவியும்.

சரியாக 10 மணிக்கு விழா துவங்கியது. முதலில் வரவேற்பு அளித்து பேசினார் மார்கெடிங் GM, பின் தலைமையுரையாற்ற வந்தார் சோமு.

” எனது அருமை தோழர்களே ! இந்த 15 ஆண்டுகளில் இரவு பகல் பாராமல் என்னுடன் இந்த கம்பெனியை இந்த உன்னத நிலைக்கு கொண்டுவர நீங்கள் மிகவும் பாடுபட்டிருகிறீர்கள். உங்கள் அயராத உழைப்பால் இன்று நம் கம்பெனி தமிழகத்தின் தலைசிறந்த 10 நிறுவனங்களில் ஒன்றாக உயர்ந்துள்ளது. இந்த நல்ல தருணத்தில் நான் கடந்து வந்த பாதையை திரும்பிப்பார்க்கிறேன். கணினி முன் அமர்ந்து காலம் நேரம் தெரியாமல் பணம், செல்வாக்கு என்று அனைத்தின் பின்னும் அலைந்து இன்று இதோ உங்கள் முன் ஒரு வெற்றிபெற்ற மனிதனாய் நிற்கின்றேன். ஆனால் இந்த 15ஆண்டுகளில் நான் இழந்து விட்டவை பல. பாசத்திற்குரிய தந்தையின் இறுதி நாட்களில் நான் அவருடன் பேசவும் நேரமில்லாமல்,  அவர் உயிர் நீத்தார். கூண்டு கிளியாய் என் மனைவியை எங்கும் அழைத்து செல்லாமல் வைத்திருந்தேன். எந்த உறவும் இல்லாமல் இன்று எல்லா வசதியுடன் உறவுகளற்ற என் மகன். இவை எல்லாம் பார்க்கும் போது நான் வந்த பாதை சரிதானா என்று ஒரு கணம் திகைக்கவைக்கிறது.

ஆகவே என் தோழர்களே இந்த ஆண்டுவிழாவில் நான் ஒரு முடிவெடுத்துள்ளேன், இன்று முதல் நம் கம்பெனியில் ஒவ்வொரு மாதமும் குடும்ப தினம் கொண்டாடப்படும், அன்று அனைவரும் உங்கள் தாய் தந்தை மன்றும் குடும்பத்துடன் வந்து கலந்துகொள்ள வேண்டும் . குழந்தைகள் விளையாட்டுத்திடல் கம்ப்யூட்டர் சென்டர் , முதியோர் நலமாய் வாழ நூல் நிலையம் என்று உருவாக்க முடிவெடுத்துள்ளேன் . மேலும் இன்றுமுதல் நான் எனது அத்தனை பொறுப்புகளையும் நமது GM திரு சேகர் அவர்களிடம் ஒப்ப்படைகிறேன். இழந்துவிட்ட என் வாழ்வின் உறவுகளை புதுபிக்கும் ஒரு புது முயற்சியில் நான் இனி என் நாட்களை கழிக்க போகிறேன்.”

பேசி முடிக்கும் பொது கண்களில் வந்த கண்ணீரை துடைத்துக்கொண்டே தன் மனைவியின் அருகில் சென்றவருக்கு ஆனந்த கண்ணீருடன் புன்முறுவல் பூத்தாள் அவரது மனைவி. அரங்கமே அதிரும்படி கைதட்டல் ஒலித்துகொண்டே இருந்தது. ஒரு ஒளி நோக்கி தன்னையும் தன் தொழிலாளர்களையும் திருப்பிவிட்ட மகிழ்ச்சியில் காரில் ஏறினார்.

 

 

THE FIRST FEW-What would you teach/inculcate in your baby first?

Every parent is so keen on teaching his/her kid so much daily. We want our kids to be smarter, healthier, more independent, wealthier, more sincere and happier and the list has no end. The more and more list goes on and on. We all wish the best for our children. Every mom and dad would have millions of plans on nurturing the baby even before having the baby. The wishes for our children are endless and so is the list of teachings/learning/practices or whatsoever. Based on my knowledge, experience and observation I felt the below have to be inculcated first. I use the word inculcated and not taught because this smart age babies don’t learn anything as you say/teach, they learn as you do. They grasp from us so rapidly.

Let me first jot down the first few things which meant more important to me in the whole lot.

1. A healthy and regular eating habit
2. A daily routine
3. Few basic manners

You may ask me why I have highlighted the above among the millions. My entire article would answer to you.
A HEALTHY & REGULAR EATING HABIT:
Until 6 months it is mandatory to only breastfeed but only on demand. Right from day one develop the habit of feeding your baby only when he/she demands. This will not only make you feel comfortable but also help in building a strong digestive system for the baby. Once you start weaning always follow a routine and do not entertain any interruptions in your routine. Talk to your doctor and decide on what to introduce when and how, make your own schedule based on baby’s demand& cues and stick to it no matter what happens. What do I mean by interruption here? Say I feed my son at a 4 hour interval when he is aged 1 year and he is completely satisfied with it. I keep receiving many comments/suggestions/orders to introduce some fillers/snacks in between stating that I make him starve for a longer duration.  I never changed my routine because I know my son is not starving as I feed him on demand and this habit for not having some filler in between is absolutely healthy.

“HEALTHY”-Introducing healthy foods is a challenge to moms these days. There are umpteen numbers of directions pointing to healthy diet. To choose one from the lot and fix on to it is the first challenge and by the time you win the first challenge, your peers will pop in with too many suggestions and confuse you enough. And when you overtake that milestone your kid grows up well, to point out and ask for all those unwanted stuffs he/she has watched in the advertisements and seen in the hands of his/her peers.  So in order to have your child undeterred, show him the right food in right quantity at the right age. Ensure that you also keep stressing to your kid that advertisements don’t always give you a right choice. A mom has to decide on what is healthy. Don’t give up that right to anyone. Once you fix those items in your menu, cultivate it as a habit.

Check out healthy home made baby food recipes here at www.kitchenkathukutty.wordpress.com/baby-food. Do not forget to like me page at www.facebook.com/KitchenKathukutty for live updates.

“REGULAR”– Are you a mom taking pride in saying “My son throws away his bowl of food, My daughter always skips her breakfast”?. It is high time you change and change your kid. The moment you begin to wean, start showing your kid that he/she would be fed only when hunger triggers and not whenever temptation triggers. You can ask me why so strict with a 6 month old baby. This is not being strict. This is being responsible. Unless you don’t cultivate the habit of having food only when hunger triggers your son/daughter might fall into a category of being tempted to eat when others eat or develop an addiction towards snacks and get into clutches of obesity.

Above all, when you ensure your baby is being fed enough the chances of crankiness gets reduced by more than 80%. Most tantrums in toddler stage occur when stomach is not filled. Most importantly the future world which our kids will be facing is definitely going to be more polluted, less immune with too much of technology and innumerable new diseases. Hence it is the duty of a mom to lay a strong foundation for a very healthy living. This is as important as adhering to the immunisation chart.

A DAILY ROUTINE:

When I started talking on this, few raised me a question,”How come a daily routine for babies? They are not machines to be coded.” Definitely babies are not machines and at the same time please remember a discipline is required for a perfect human life. Discipline can sound too much with a baby. I mean not a very stringent and strict discipline here.

A routine can be as simple as making your child pray, greet elders, brush, use potty as soon as he/she wakes up .Once you start showing your baby this routine in the morning, the lovely prince/princess will definitely get to that path as he/grows. Do not impose this on a single dawn. Do it gradually. It might take even 6 months to one year for your little one to catch up but once they get fixed to it, they will definitely not change the routine. Patience and perseverance is the key here. You might feel what is the point in doing these so early even before my child is one.   I would like to remind you of the famous saying “Bend the twig, bend the tree “.Once again I stress, Moms! You take the right of fixing up the routine because there is no better person in this world than a mom to know what is right/wrong for her child.

FEW BASIC MANNERS:

I quote the word few because my entire recommendation for your child is to begin these before he/she goes to preschool/playschool. And there are certain basic manners which have to be developed by mother and mother only. A child learns 200% from mother and 100% from all other sources is my strong belief and opinion.
Few of the basic manners which a parent can illustrate to a child on a daily basis are as follows

• Brush twice a day.
• Wash your hands before and after you use your washroom.
• Respect elders.
• Value everything and everybody.
• Clean your hands and mouth after every meal/drink.
• Clean and independent eating habits.
• The habit of saying sorry/thank you/welcome.
• Accept your mistakes.
• Be polite.

The above habits can’t be taught by writing them on a black board or repeating to your kid 10 times a day. These have to be the habits of both the parents in their daily lives. The child starts observing you from the moment he/she out of the womb (even within the womb). If you can showcase these simple things in your day to day activities your children will soon develop an attitude to incorporate all these practices as they grow.  One more important habit we have to cultivate is to say “NO” when we have to. Don’t let your child take you for granted when he misbehaves the very first time.

If you would take simple measures to show them the above three most essential (according to me) at a very early stage you will never be in a position to hunt for any articles stating “A guide to withstand toddler tantrums, How to handle adamant nature of your son/daughter, Top 5 ways to make school going children eat healthy “in later stages. You will never face a scenario where your kith and kin feel disgusted/irritated/embarrassed by your kid’s behaviour in a crowd. You can walk with your head held high with a confidence of having laid a strong foundation for your prince/princess.

The main reason behind stressing on these 3 is,I strongly believe that “A healthy person with rich moral values in life will never have any everlasting sad path in his/her lifetime” .And also I chose to highlight this to moms because mothers are like the potters who mould the fresh clay(baby).It is our duty to mould them right. When I penning down this article a old Tamil song lyric flashed in my mind “entha kulanthaiyum nalla kulanthai than mannil pirakkaiyile avan nallavanavathum theeyavan avathum annai valarpinile”. It means every baby is born perfect and becoming a good or bad human depends on the way which “THE MOTHER” nurtures. This doesn’t mean a dad has no role to do. It only means a mom has a better opportunity. Hence moms, grab the opportunity

P.S: All the above points are my personal opinion and I am absolutely not an expert. I have no intention to hurt the feelings of anyone.

A lone mom’s day

Most moms these days manage their kids all alone. There is no more challenging job that raising your kids,especially from new born stage to school goer stage. I have been trying to jot down my thoughts since my son was born. But it took me an year to finally put it in words.If you are supported enough by your elders,I would call you lucky and I salute them. If you have a kid who sleeps on a routine then the below article wouldn’t be of much meaning to you.

Most moms these days manage their kids all alone. There is no more challenging job that raising your kids,especially from new born stage to school goer stage. I have been trying to jot down my thoughts since my son was born. But it took me an year to finally put it in words.If you are supported enough by your elders,I would call you lucky and I salute them. If you have a kid who sleeps on a routine then the below article wouldn’t be of much meaning to you..First I would like to define the term “lone mom” here. A mom who lives with her 24/7 working husband and her new born all alone.

Motherhood is equally blessed and at times cursed too, especially for first time moms handling baby and household all by themselves

6 a.m – The sun has risen up so early. It feels like I just closed my eyes. Though I am still feeling sleepy, I have to get all works done before little one wakes up and also see that my husband leaves on time to his office.

6.15 a.m – I am at the washroom. I am sharpening my ears before I commence brushing, because my little one would scream anytime.

6.30 a.m – Collect milk and newspaper and enter the kitchen. Thinking “What to cook?” I boiled the milk and set it aside. I started collecting the ingredients for the days cooking. Oh God! My son is making some noise. Rushing into the bedroom I am finding him with his eyelids half open, checking my arrival and then sleeping peacefully. I soak his clothes for wash and also clean the floor in a jiffy.

7 a.m – Husband wakes up and carries his routine like brushing, reading newspaper, pressing clothes. I am handing him his cup of coffee and running towards kitchen to switch off the gas.

7.30 a.m – Cooking is on a full swing and I am slowly jotting down the works for rest of the day, washing clothes, mopping, washing vessels and the remaining part of cooking.

8 a.m – Breakfast is about to be ready and my lovely son wakes and jumps out of his cradle. I am requesting my husband to have an eye on the rest of the finishing works for breakfast.

8.05 a.m – Picking him from cradle, I feed him and try to make him sleep. But he readily jumps to play.

8.10 a.m – Husband is getting ready. I am taking my little one to washroom and gave him a slight face wash and gave him a smooth press on his gums as his lower teeth sprouts.

8.20 a.m – I try to make him poop in his potty and he is making a big fuss. “Success”… He won me as he enjoyed his water games and I won by making him use the potty. My husband is asking for his breakfast. I am running from washroom with little one draped in towel and setting his play area. He is not ready to leave me. So I am rushing to get him dressed and then to kitchen.

8.30 a.m – The breakfast plate is ready for husband. He tries to take my son in control so that I can have my bath. But he is not ready for it. The only way to soothe him is to take him with me or else he will spoil my husband’s breakfast. With him I try to clear out vessels and close few other pending works for lunch.

8.45 a.m – My son’s breakfast is ready and I am ready to feed him. He is even more ready and rushing towards to get the bowl. My husband takes a leave. My son is crawling as fast as he can to reach the door. So I am here taking a longer feet and catching him.

8.50 a.m – 9.40 a.m – Initially he eats three to four spoons in his high chair. Then he calls “Heyyyyyyyyyyy” in the top of his voice to come out of it and he finally succeeds. We are exploring the entire house with the food bowl. He spills the food all over him and the floor wherever he can. With much of efforts I am completing around half the bowl and in not even a nano second he grabs the bowl and throws it. This is to communicate to me that he is done. Sleep is inviting him but he is fully drenched in food. After huge battle I make him neat and place him in the cradle.

9.50 a.m – Rocking the cradle and finding him almost asleep I try to collect my breakfast. But he screams saying I am yet to sleep. “Trin trin”. My mom is over the phone. I manage to say her that I would call back as I am in a huge task of making her grandson sleep.

10.15 a.m – He has slept. God only knows when he would get up. So I quickly rushed to have my shower. But my mom calls me again and ensures that have my breakfast. She actually wants to know about her grandson in detail. But she realizes that I am running on my toes with empty stomach since morning, she dropped the line stressing on my breakfast. I swallowed my breakfast in no time.

10.30 a.m – I am closing the remaining kitchen works, mopping and running to the cradle because he trying to wake up. Soothing him down, I decide to wash clothes first so that I can also watch him.

11.00 a.m – He is still fast asleep. I decide to have a shower. I really want to relax myself in my shower as it is scorching hot and I am tired. But I am scared if he would wake up. I sharpened my ears, prayed to all possible Gods and started my shower. I am continuously hearing his scream. Do you know? He is sleeping but this is my imagination.

11.10 a.m – Done with my shower in a hurry, I next rush to dry clothes in the terrace. Before I could reach my door, my son’s cry reached me. HE WOKE UP. Leaving all clothes as such, I am picking him and getting ready for his bath.

11.30 a.m – The prince is clean and fresh now. I am constantly thinking on untried clothes and the washroom left as such after his bath. My son is firmly attached to me and I am unable to move even for my nature’s calls. With no option left I started engaging him in play. I try to talk to my parents in between but he keeps pulling my mobile and disconnecting.

12.30 p.m – Time for my son’s lunch. I am somehow diverting him and trying to move to pick his food. But in no time he is on my kitchen carpet. I forcefully take him and place him in his swing and started mashing his food.

12.30 p.m to 1.30 p.m – The explorer mode is on and we are feeding all micro organisms on the floor. A sign of relief in me as finishes his lunch. My husband arrives for lunch and he stresses to join me with him for lunch.

1.30 p.m to 1.45 p.m – We are trying to eat with him on his walker. He makes big fuss and comes down onto the floor. His first target is grabbing his dad’s plate. Then chase and have all spilled food. In 10 minutes time, he makes me take minimum of 5 breaks from my lunch to make him clean after his nature’s calls.

2. p.m – I am done with few bits of my lunch and dropped my plate in the sink as my little one got cranky. My husband leaves for work.

2 p.m to 4 p.m – He plays, he cries for sleep, I drop him in the cradle and rock, he jumps out of cradle or he pees. The cycle continues.

4. p.m to 4.45 p.m – He sleeps. The moment he slept I rushed to dry the clothes. Thank God the sun is hot and dresses will dry in 2 hours in open terrace. I clear the kitchen and try to lie down. He jumps off the cradle and smiles at me.

5 p.m to 6 p.m – His snack time. he is on the window pane and shouting. All trespassers notice him. I carry him at least thrice to the terrace and collect all dried clothes. On the way he drops a minimum of two clothes. Climbing terrace and poor eating all through the day has made me exhausted. I place him in his play area and try to grab some drink and snack.

6 p.m to 6.30 p.m- Freshen up, pray and proceed for walking. The only time when he is slightly manageable.

6.30 p.m- His dad arrives. If this timing is missing I am dead. My son would on top of his pranks missing his dad. I arrange for all that my husband needs with my son glued to me and sit with a relief finally after handing him to his dad.

7 p.m to 8 p.m – Father and son plays. I prepare dinner. A minimum of 100 times my little one will invite me by screaming. My shuttle between kitchen and hall begins.

8. p.m to 9 p.m – I parallelly finish preparing dinner for us and also feeding him with dinner.

9 p.m to 11 p.m – I complete all pending household of the day while my husband is looking after son. He feels sleepy around 9.30 p.m. My husband tries to takes him to the bedroom. But my son arches back and cries so loud that the entire apartment hears him. We try to make him play, have a bath, prayer and all gimmicks we can, till 11 p.m and finally drop him in his cradle.

11 p.m – 12 a.m – I rock his cradle, my husband rocks his cradle, we try to make him sleep on bed/lap/floor. But he tries to jump and play. He succeeds most of the times and pulls down all items in the shelf. After huge struggle I get him to the cradle and my husband goes to sleep. Rocking for about half an hour I find him asleep.

12.30 a.m- Clearing all mess he has made all through the day, I stretch my back on the bed.

1 a.m – I am about to sleep. “Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”…. This is my son. he has an extra sense which notifies him the moment I hit the bed. I again pacify him and make him sleep

1.30 a.m – I fall asleep.

2.30 a.m- I am sleeping but I realise my son is awake and trying to get out of the cradle. I take him, make him sleep on my lap and drop him on the cot in between us

3 a.m to 5 a.m – He sleeps. I also sleep. But I keep attending to him as he tries to roll across the bed and screams in sleep

5 a.m to 6 a.m – I really sleep paying no attention to my instincts and my son as I am totally collapsed physically.

6 a.m.-Scroll up. Its dawn again.

This is the story of a very ordinary day. There comes very terrific days when either my son or myself falls sick, when my husband comes late in night, when my husband leaves out station/leaves early to office. I haven’t mentioned many parts of my day to keep in short and simple. Few include his spill over all around the house and clearing that mess, trying to keep up my blog(www.kitchenkathukutty.wordpress.com) running with one hand typing and one hand rocking the cradle,mopping the house at least 3 times a day,running behind to avoid him swallowing anything he grabs.

Anybody who reads this might find that the apt topic would be “perils of motherhood”. But a loving mom would never feel so. Though I am stressed, tired, exhausted, haunted I don’t feel this as a burden because I love my son. His smile, his intelligent pranks, his stage by stage development brings heaven to earth. Nothing/nobody in this world can make me happy and blessed like him. My child makes me proud,elited,happy,joyful and at times of course pshycic. ALL IN THE GAME. 😛

Happy parenting 🙂